je voudrais que tu te rappellesnotre amour est éternel et pas artificiel
vive_le_spence
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Name: Jeffrey
Country: United States
State: Illinois
Metro: Champaign-Urbana
Birthday: 4/19/1986
Gender: Male


Interests: triathlons. jazz. coffee. God. public radio. culture.
Expertise: i am at an expert at what you think i am an expert at.
Occupation: Student
Industry: Research


Message: message me


Member Since: 11/6/2005

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Thursday, July 27, 2006

au revoir, mes amis

http://www.noguffjeff.blogspot.com


Thursday, July 13, 2006

uh oh...

so, it has been a dramatic past few weeks.

last week, the day before the 4th of july, i started getting sick with stomach pains and being very tired. i went home and slept. the next day, i got really dizzy and received my first ever headache. i was also very tired, and from time to time, i could not stand for prolonged periods of time. pretty soon, my neck started getting stiff and a rash developed over an old mosquito bite. the doctors thought i could have had the west nile...until the disease i had started attacking my liver.

though i may feel fine, my liver is twice the size it should be and it is spitting out 3 times the enzymes than normal. the doctors think i may have hepatitis, which is funny since i dont do anything that may merit me being contaminated. it is wierd.

i have been a lab monkey for 1.5 weeks...and they still dont know what is going on.

if i have any type of hepatitis or if my enzymes dont get better, i may be in danger of being too sick to go to france...which may make me be back in chambana next year. i may be disappointed...very disappointed.

pray for me


Wednesday, July 05, 2006

la marseillaise

why cant our national anthem be as cool as the french's?

Allons enfants de la Patrie
Le jour de gloire est arrivé.
Contre nous, de la tyrannie,
L'étandard sanglant est levé,
l'étandard sanglant est levé,
Entendez-vous, dans la compagnes.
Mugir ces farouches soldats
Ils viennent jusque dans nos bras
Egorger vos fils,
vos compagnes.

Aux armes citoyens!
Formez vos bataillons,
Marchons, marchons!
Qu'un sang impur
Abreuve nos sillons.

Amour sacré de la Patrie,
Conduis, soutiens nos bras vengeurs,
Liberté, liberté cherie,
Combats avec tes defénseurs;
Combats avec tes défenseurs.
Sous drapeaux, que la victoire
Acoure à tes mâles accents;
Que tes ennemis expirants
Voient ton triomphe et notre gloire!

Aux armes citoyens!
Formez vos bataillons,
Marchons, marchons!
Qu'un sang impur
Abreuve nos sillons.

----for those of you who do not know french----

Let us go, children of the fatherland
Our day of Glory has arrived.
Against us stands tyranny,
The bloody flag is raised,
The bloody flag is raised.
Do you hear in the countryside
The roar of these savage soldiers
They come right into our arms
To cut the throats of your sons,
your country.

To arms, citizens!
Form up your battalions
Let us march, Let us march!
That their impure blood
Should water our fields

Sacred love of the fatherland
Guide and support our vengeful arms.
Liberty, beloved liberty,
Fight with your defenders;
Fight with your defenders.
Under our flags, so that victory
Will rush to your manly strains;
That your dying enemies
Should see your triumph and glory

To arms, citizens!
Form up your battalions
Let us march, Let us march!
That their impure blood
Should water our fields





THAT THEIR IMPURE BLOOD SHOULD WATER OUR FIELDS....

that makes america sound like the nerd kid of the world society.



in honor of the french soccer team, who will probably win the world cup.


Monday, July 03, 2006

fading from blue to grey...

france is looming in the not so distant future--only 3 weekends left before the chaos ensues:

weekend 1 (JULY 8th and 9th): i will be heading to chambana... let me know if you wanna have coffee
weekend 2 (JULY 15th and 16th): i will be heading up to a lake in wisconsin to spend some time with my coworkers
weekend 3 (JULY 22nd and 23rd): my sis will be coming in to town where we will be spending some quality family time together.

i leave on july 27th.

it is amazing how things have fallen distinctly in line for france. i am almost there.


work is tough. far too many hours with far too little pay--but that doesnt matter since i can already see the changes in kids. i have won the counselor of the week award for 4 weeks in a row, which is pretty funny. the day camp that i am working for is primarily for DCFS and broken families, so there are a lot of kids who are square pegs in round holes--but i wouldnt change it for the world.

it has been tough being home. my parents bring a totally different being out of me than what is usually seen, which has me worried. i have taken an incredibly pessimistic viewpoint on life, which i know is not normal for me. my parents are always scared of everything, and, for a person who is trying to destroy his sense of self-security, it creates a rift. so, i guess i realize that "home" home is not really a good home for me.

it has been difficult finding a new church here, and, though to the naked eye it may seem as if i have been drifting, i assure you that i am as strong as ever, getting ready for a time that may or may not be chaotic.

i saw the movie cars the other day...it was quite good. not a kids movie whatsoever. it makes me think about how fast society has gotten, and how i have fallen into a similar groove.

the tour de france, the most publicized cycling event, is on every day now. that combined with the french soccer team "les bleues" making it to the quarter finals, has placed me into a moment of total bliss.

----

i find it disturbing how the "sending off into life" process is designed to make the simple ultimately complex. a good analogy would be with rock climbing. when beginning, it is good to start out bouldering--remaining at the same height, scaling across a rock--and work your way up to climbing cliffs with top ropes and compound sets. the ultimate saying of a rock climber should be: how can i get from being down here to up there in the most energy efficient, dutiful manner...

along the way, there is a stage of develpment where the climber to be will try moves that he is incapable of, replacing the beautifully simple concept of scaling a cliff with an overall ugly approach to solving a problem. (one good example would be a move where the climber affixes his upper body to an alcove and swings his lower body on top of the upper body [like a trapeze artist], to the point where he is standing directly 2 ft. above his last position. this replaces the whole easy way of climbing around, avoiding the obstacle altogether.) though it can be understood that he is trying to improve himself, he is also building a mountain in the middle of a prairie, and the goal of moving through the prairie is hindered.

is it better to build yourself by creating your own obstacles or to wait to see what the cliff may throw at you? if one tries to build his own obstacles, he may lose sight of his goals--if one continues scaling, he may become overwhelmed due to inexperience...

i have realized that i build my own obstacles to "prepare me for whats ahead". even with my relationship with christ, i am finding that the obstacles i create for myself are unnecessary and vain. shouldnt i be trusting more? shouldnt i be relying more on my belay to help me up the side? by testing myself, is it just wasting my energy before the real terrain begins?

i continue to feel the pull to world missions and foreign aid, but i am becoming wary due to the standards that have been set for me. what is the point of leaving u of i, finding a job, creating a family, and getting fat and happy if i feel as if i have been ignoring what could be my purpose? i am only tiring myself out, and, due to the new found fatigue, i have realized that my "purposes" are being replaced. it is getting harder to throw a punch at the machine that is society.

____


just some thoughts.

i miss being around ilife. i miss being around 5 other guys.


Wednesday, June 28, 2006

i dyed my hair blue. i dont know why.

some people would say that i let my friends mold me too much. others would say that i did it because i am random. still others say that i did it because my kids would love me more at camp. the more witty people say that it is because the french soccer team (commonly known as the "bleues" among people) dominated spain last night.

really, it is because i felt like i needed a change.




but change is all that i will be getting soon...

stagnacity is seeming to plague my life right now...in all tacets.



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